A guy went to a psychiatrist because he was having severe problems with his sex life. The psychiatrist asked him a lot of questions, but he couldn't get a clear picture of the problems. Finally he asked, "Do you ever watch your girlfriend's face while you're having sex?"

"Well, yes, I did once."

"And how did she look?"

"Oh boy, she looked very angry!"

At this point the psychiatrist felt that he was really getting somewhere. "Well that's very interesting, we must look into this further. Now tell me, you say that you have only seen your girlfriend's face once during sex. That seems somewhat unusual. How did it occur that you saw her face that time?"

"She was watching us through the window." no regrets!
ONE LIFE LIVE IT.

superb

There were these two twins, Joe and John. Joe was the owner of an old dilapidated boat. It just so happened that John's wife died the same day that Joe's boat sank. A few days later, a kindly old woman saw Joe and mistaked him for John and stated, "I'm sorry to hear about your loss. You must feel terrible."

Joe, thinking she was talking about the boat, said, "Hell no, fact is I'm sort of glad to be rid of her, she was a rotten old thing from the beginning. Her bottom was all shriveled up and she smelled like an old dead fish. She was always losing water. She had a bad crack in the back and a pretty big hole in the front too. Every time I used her, her hole got bigger and she leaked like crazy. I guess what finally finished her off was when I rented her to these four guys looking for a good time. I warned them that she wasn't very good, but they wanted to use her anyhow. The damn fools all tried to get in her at once and she split right up the damn middle!!!"

The old woman fainted no regrets!
ONE LIFE LIVE IT.

 some of my Previous cars
--------------------------------
P38 Range Rover Autobiography
RRS 2.7 HSE Silver
RRS TDV8 HSE silver
FFRR Vogue black
Disco3 HSE silver
RRS 2.7 HSE silver
RRS 3.0 HSE BALTI BLUE
______________________________
current vehicles
RRS 3.0 L494 Autobiography
Audi R8 V10 Spyder
AC Cobra
Landrover Defender 90
Landrover Defender 110
Suzuki Jimney

Two cowboys from Arkansas walk
into a roadhouse to wash the trail dust
from their throats. They stand at the
bar, drinking their beers and talking
quietly about cattle prices.

Suddenly a woman at a table behind
them who had been eating a sandwich
begins to cough. After a minute or
so it becomes apparent that she is in
real distress. The cowboys turn to look at her.

"Kin yah swallow? Asked one of the cowboys.
The woman shakes her head "No"
"Kin yah breathe?" asked the other cowboy.
The woman, beginning to turn
a bit blue, shakes her head "NO" again.

The first cowboy walks over to her,
lifts up the back of her skirt,
yanks down her panties, and slowly runs
his tongue from the back of her thigh
up to the small of her back. This shocks
the woman to a violent spasm, the
obstruction flies out of her mouth,
and she begins to breathe again.

The cowboy walks back over to the
bar and takes a drink of his beer.
His partner says, "Ya know, I'd heard
of that there Hind Lick Maneuver, but
I ain't never seen nobody do it. no regrets!
ONE LIFE LIVE IT.

A guy is driving around the back woods of Tennessee and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house:
"Talking Dog for Sale ."
The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there.
"You talk?" he asks.
"Yep," the Lab replies.
After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says
"So, what's your story?"
The Lab looks up and says,
"Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA and they had me sworn into the toughest branch of the armed services..the United States Marines ... you know one of their nicknames is "The
Devil Dogs".In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders; because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running, but the jetting around really tired me out and I knew I wasn't getting any younger. So, I decided to settle down. I retired from the Corps (8 dog years is 56 Corps years) and signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was
awarded a batch of medals. I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just
retired."
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.
"Ten dollars," the guy says.
"Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?"
"Because he's a liar. He never did any of that . He was in the Navy!"

Ivery=
Pussy=  MY12 SDV6 HSE Sumatra/Ebony/Piano/Sidesteps/Privacy/Overfinch Olympus/JLR DRLs

The head nun tells the two new nuns that they have to paint their room without getting any paint on their clothes. So the one nun says to the other, "Hey, let's take all our clothes off, fold them up, and lock the door."

So they do this, and begin painting their room. Soon they hear a knock at the door. They ask, "Who is it?"

"Blind man!"

The nuns look at each other, then one nun says, "He's blind, he can't see. What could it hurt." They let him in.

The blind man walks in and says, "Hey, nice tits. Where do you want me to hang the blinds?" no regrets!
ONE LIFE LIVE IT.

like that one

 MY12 SDV6 HSE Sumatra/Ebony/Piano/Sidesteps/Privacy/Overfinch Olympus/JLR DRLs

A mother cleaning her son's room finds an S&M magazine under the bed.
Upset, she immediately shows the magazine to her husband.
"Well?" his wife asks. "What do you think we should do?"
"I'm not sure," the father replies. "But we certainly shouldn't spank him." no regrets!
ONE LIFE LIVE IT.