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Home > Off Topic > Jokes |
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Brian Mason Member Since: 31 Aug 2006 Location: Lurking with intent!!! Posts: 5326 |
MY12 SDV6 HSE Sumatra/Ebony/Piano/Sidesteps/Privacy/Overfinch Olympus/JLR DRLs |
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Sat Jun 30 2007 1:42am |
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pussy Member Since: 22 Feb 2007 Location: uk Posts: 1749 |
A young man goes home from a war to see his mother in the hills of West Virginia. She has never left the hills and has never seen anything like her son's uniform or gun. He shows his mother both items, then she asks about the grenades on his belt. He says,“'Well, you pull the pin and throw it.” She still doesn't quite get it, so he decides to demonstrate and throws it into the backyard. The outhouse blows up and his mother cries, “Son you shouldn't have done that! Your father was in there.” And out crawls his father, all covered in dirt. He looks over at the hole and says, “Good thing I didn't let that off in the house.” no regrets!
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Sat Jun 30 2007 7:03pm |
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Cliff H Member Since: 03 Dec 2005 Location: uk Posts: 3233 |
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Sat Jun 30 2007 7:15pm |
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pussy Member Since: 22 Feb 2007 Location: uk Posts: 1749 |
A rather confident young man walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive young woman. He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks at his watch for a moment.
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Sat Jun 30 2007 7:24pm |
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Cliff H Member Since: 03 Dec 2005 Location: uk Posts: 3233 |
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Sat Jun 30 2007 7:25pm |
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pussy Member Since: 22 Feb 2007 Location: uk Posts: 1749 |
Brian goes to his eye doctor for an examination. They start talking as the doctor is examining his eyes. In the middle of their conversation, the doctor casually says, "You need to stop masturbating."
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Sat Jun 30 2007 8:37pm |
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Cliff H Member Since: 03 Dec 2005 Location: uk Posts: 3233 |
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Sat Jun 30 2007 8:40pm |
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pussy Member Since: 22 Feb 2007 Location: uk Posts: 1749 |
no regrets!
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Sat Jun 30 2007 8:54pm |
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pussy Member Since: 22 Feb 2007 Location: uk Posts: 1749 |
There was a lawyer and he was just waking up from anesthesia after surgery, and his wife was sitting by his side. His eyes fluttered open and he said, “You're beautiful!” and then he fell asleep again. His wife had never heard him say that so she stayed by his side. A couple minutes later his eyes fluttered open and he said “You're cute!” Well, the wife was dissapointed because instead of “beautiful” it was “cute.” She said “What happened to ‘beautiful’? His reply was “The drugs are wearing off!” no regrets!
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Sat Jun 30 2007 9:00pm |
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Brian Mason Member Since: 31 Aug 2006 Location: Lurking with intent!!! Posts: 5326 |
The bloody Doctor said he wouldn't tell anybody and promised me patient confidentiality! Pussy, great jokes... MY12 SDV6 HSE Sumatra/Ebony/Piano/Sidesteps/Privacy/Overfinch Olympus/JLR DRLs |
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Sun Jul 01 2007 1:42am |
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ENVOY Member Since: 09 Nov 2006 Location: In the shit as usual Posts: 5823 |
where did you get that lot from some of my Previous cars
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Sun Jul 01 2007 6:56am |
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Kaine Member Since: 26 May 2006 Location: Hills of Shropshire Posts: 8902 |
Pussy - great jokes , but I'm a little concerned that ENVOY is now asking you questions via the forum and not face to face have you thrown him out |
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Sun Jul 01 2007 9:51am |
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pussy Member Since: 22 Feb 2007 Location: uk Posts: 1749 |
no Kaine, the old love lump is still at home, he just forgets to talk to me.
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Sun Jul 01 2007 10:47am |
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Kaine Member Since: 26 May 2006 Location: Hills of Shropshire Posts: 8902 |
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Sun Jul 01 2007 10:49am |
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