2009 Outstanding Contribution Award - Joint Runner Up
2009 'Tech-Head Of The Year' Award - Runner Up

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These should definitely make you chuckle.

Why We Love Children

1. A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he'd found a cat, but it was dead.
"How do you know that the cat was dead?" she asked her pupil.
"Because I in its ear and it didn't move," answered the child innocently.
You did WHAT ? ! ?" the teacher exclaimed in surprise.
"You know,"explained the boy, "I leaned over and went 'Pssst!' and it didn't move."

2. It was that time, during the Sunday morning service, for the children's sermon. All the children were invited to come forward. One little girl was wearing a particularly pretty dress and, as she sat down, the pastor leaned over and said, "That is a very pretty dress. Is it your Easter Dress?"
The little girl replied, directly into the pastor's clip-on microphone,
"Yes, and my Mom says it's a bitch to iron."

3. When I was six months pregnant with my third child, my three year old came into the room when I was just getting ready to get into the shower. She said, "Mommy, you are getting fat!"
I replied, "Yes, honey, remember Mommy has a baby growing in her tummy."
"I know," she replied, but what's growing in your butt?"

4. A little boy was doing his math homework. He said to himself, "Two plus five, that son of a bitch is seven. Three plus six, that son of a bitch is nine...."
His mother heard what he was saying and gasped, "What are you doing?"
The little boy answered, "I'm doing my math homework, Mom."
"And this is how your teacher taught you to do it?" the mother asked.
"Yes," he answered.
Infuriated, the mother asked the teacher the next day, "What are you teaching my son in math?"
The teacher replied, "Right now, we are learning addition."
The mother asked, "And are you teaching them to say two plus two, that son of a bitch is four?"
After the teacher stopped laughing, she answered, "What I taught them was, two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH, is four."

5. One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of Chicken Little to her class. She came to the part of the story where
Chicken Little tried to warn the farmer. She read, ".... and so Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, "The sky is falling, the sky is falling!"
The teacher paused then asked the class, "And what do you think that farmer said?"
One little girl raised her hand and said, "I think he said: 'Holy ! A talking chicken!'"
The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.

6. A certain little girl, when asked her name, would reply, "I'm Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter."
Her mother told her this was wrong, she must say, "I'm Jane Sugarbrown."
The Vicar spoke to her in Sunday School, and said, "Aren't you Mr Sugarbrown's daughter?"
She replied, "I thought I was, but mother says I'm not."

7. A little girl asked her mother, "Can I go outside and play with the boys?"
Her mother replied, "No, you can't play with the boys, they're too rough."
The little girl thought about it for a few moments and asked, "If I can find a smooth one, can I play with him?"

8. A little girl goes to the barber shop with her father. She stands next to the barber chair, while her dad gets his hair cut, eating a snack cake.
The barber says to her, "Sweetheart, you're gonna get hair on your Twinkie."
She says, "Yes, I know, and I'm gonna get boobs too." Arctic Frost TDV6 SE. Aspen Leather, Cherry Wood, Privacy Glass, PTI, Tow Pack, Mudflaps, Tasmods, a new Fuelflap, a RRSport.co.uk umbrella in the boot & a RRSport.co.uk sticker on the rear glass.
__________________

Some people accuse me of thinking the world revolves around me, but I'm not stupid . . . I know it revolves around the sun. Which shines out of my @rse!!!

 2002 Discovery Adventurer LE
1998 Freelander xedi
Ertl limited edition RRS model number 817

 RRS TDV6 Gone but still around
SL55 AMG
760Li Alpina
BMW 535D M Sport
BMW X6 XDrive35D
BMW 320D Coupe M Sport
And A Van For Rex!

WINNER - 2008's Idler Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Comedian Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Funniest Incident

I love boobies i love boobies i love boobies cuz i'm a big kid now! (Come on everybody sing with me you know the words!)

A husband is at home watching a football game on TV, when his wife interrupts, "Honey, could you fix the light in the hallway? It's been flickering for weeks now."

He looks up from the TV and reply's angrily, "Fix the light, now? Does it look like I have Curries Electrics written on my forehead? I don't think so!"

The wife asks, "Well could you fix the fridge door, it won't close properly."

He looks up from the TV again, "Fix the fridge door? Does it look like I have Hotpoint Engineer written on my forehead? I don't think so!"


"Fine," she says, "Then could you at least fix the steps to the front door? They are loose and someone is bound to slip and hurt themselves."

"I'm not a damned carpenter," he yelled, "I don't want to fix the steps. Does it look like I have Focus Do It All written on my forehead? I don't think so!! I've had enough of your moaning I'm off down the pub."

So he goes to the pub and drinks for the next couple of hours. He starts to feel a little bit guilty about the way he spoke to his wife and decides to go home and help out.

As he walks upto the house, he notices that the steps have already been fixed. As he enters the house he sees that the hall light is working. He goes to get a beer and notices that the fridge door has been fixed.

"Honey," he calls, "How did you get all of this fixed?"

She replied, "Well, when you stormed off, I sat on the front step crying, just then a very nice young man asked me what was wrong and I told him about the light, the fridge door and the front step. He offered to do all of the repairs and all I had to do in return was either go to bed with him or bake him a cake."

"So what type of cake did you bake?" asked the husband.


"Helloooo . . . . do I look as if I've got Delia Smith written on my forehead? I don't think so!" Arctic Frost TDV6 SE. Aspen Leather, Cherry Wood, Privacy Glass, PTI, Tow Pack, Mudflaps, Tasmods, a new Fuelflap, a RRSport.co.uk umbrella in the boot & a RRSport.co.uk sticker on the rear glass.
__________________

Some people accuse me of thinking the world revolves around me, but I'm not stupid . . . I know it revolves around the sun. Which shines out of my @rse!!!

 Runner up - 2009 Best Avatar Award
Joint runner up - 2009 Outstanding Contribution Award
WINNER - 2008 ‘Best Thread’ Award – Beautiful Women Of The World
Runner Up - 2008 Comedian Of The Year Award
Runner Up - 2008’s Funniest Incident

06 RRS TDV6 HSE, Java/Ebony, PTI, Running Boards, Privacy, S/C Grille/Vents, Stormers, Tasmods - GONE - (

 RRS TDV6 Gone but still around
SL55 AMG
760Li Alpina
BMW 535D M Sport
BMW X6 XDrive35D
BMW 320D Coupe M Sport
And A Van For Rex!

WINNER - 2008's Idler Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Comedian Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Funniest Incident

I love boobies i love boobies i love boobies cuz i'm a big kid now! (Come on everybody sing with me you know the words!)

Two 90 year olds had been dating for a while, when the man told the woman, "Well, tonight's the night we have sex!"

And so they did.

As they are lying in bed afterward, the man thinks to himself,
"My God, if I knew she was a virgin, I would have been much more gentle with her!"

And the woman was thinking to herself,
"My God, if I knew the old geezer could actually get it up, I would have taken off my pantyhose!" Malaysia Boleh!
4.2SC Chawton White, Stormers
Tasmod's Sills, Wind Deflectors, LR Sills
Clear Side Repeaters, Towbar
Larini Sports Exhaust, K&N Air Filter
______________________________
WINNER - 2008 'Tech-Head Of The Year' Award
WINNER - 2009 Outstanding Contribution
WINNER - 2009 'Tech-Head Of The Year' Award

 RRS TDV6 Gone but still around
SL55 AMG
760Li Alpina
BMW 535D M Sport
BMW X6 XDrive35D
BMW 320D Coupe M Sport
And A Van For Rex!

WINNER - 2008's Idler Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Comedian Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Funniest Incident

I love boobies i love boobies i love boobies cuz i'm a big kid now! (Come on everybody sing with me you know the words!)

All -  

2009 Outstanding Contribution Award - Joint Runner Up
2009 'Tech-Head Of The Year' Award - Runner Up

Like it here? Then Donate to RRSPORT!!

Uuurrrggghh! But none the less! Runner up - 2009 Best Avatar Award
Joint runner up - 2009 Outstanding Contribution Award
WINNER - 2008 ‘Best Thread’ Award – Beautiful Women Of The World
Runner Up - 2008 Comedian Of The Year Award
Runner Up - 2008’s Funniest Incident

06 RRS TDV6 HSE, Java/Ebony, PTI, Running Boards, Privacy, S/C Grille/Vents, Stormers, Tasmods - GONE - (

Two buddies were sharing drinks while discussing their wives.
"Do you and your wife ever do it doggie style?" asked one.

"Well, not exactly," his friend replied, "she's more into the trick dog aspect of it."

"Oh, I see. Kinky, huh?"

"Well, not exactly - I sit up and beg and she rolls over and plays dead." Malaysia Boleh!
4.2SC Chawton White, Stormers
Tasmod's Sills, Wind Deflectors, LR Sills
Clear Side Repeaters, Towbar
Larini Sports Exhaust, K&N Air Filter
______________________________
WINNER - 2008 'Tech-Head Of The Year' Award
WINNER - 2009 Outstanding Contribution
WINNER - 2009 'Tech-Head Of The Year' Award

In a Jeremy Clarkson manner ........... Oh Yes  
" WITH MORE EXTRAS THAN A HOLLYWOOD EPIC "

funny.. check this out..
can't believe this actually was posted, but who knows..
as we know from this forum there are a lot of people with a lot of free time!!

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2006/03/31/ebay_box_sale/

Very good Kam but what you trying to say about the free time  RRS TDV6 Gone but still around
SL55 AMG
760Li Alpina
BMW 535D M Sport
BMW X6 XDrive35D
BMW 320D Coupe M Sport
And A Van For Rex!

WINNER - 2008's Idler Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Comedian Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Funniest Incident

I love boobies i love boobies i love boobies cuz i'm a big kid now! (Come on everybody sing with me you know the words!)