1. When she asks how she looks, shrug and say "could be better" this will
keep her on her toes, and girls love that.

2. Never hold her hand. This can be interpreted as a sign of weakness (or if
she grabs your hand squeeze hers really, really hard until she cries. This
will impress her by showing her what a strong man you are.)

3. Once a month sneak up on her from behind and knock her over. Girls are
like dogs. They love to be roughed up.

4. Call her in the middle of the night to ask if she's sleeping. If she is
say "you better be" , repeat this 4 or 5 times until morning. This will show
her you care.

5. When she is upset about something, suggest to her that it might be her
fault. This will pave the way for her own personal improvement, and every
girl needs some improvement.

6. Recognize the small things, they usually mean the most. Then when she's
sleeping, steal all her small things and break them. Because jewellery is
for puss1es.

7. If you're talking to another girl, make sure she's looking. When she is,
stare into her eyes mouth the words fu*k you and grab the other girls arse.
Girls love competition.

8. Tell her you're taking her out to dinner. Drive for miles so she thinks
it's going to be really special. Then take her to a burning tire yard. When
she starts to get upset tell her you were just kidding and now you're really
going to take her to dinner. Then drive her home. When she starts crying and
asks why you would do something like that lean over and whisper very quietly
into her ear "...because I can."

9. Introduce her to your friends as "some chick". Women love those special
nicknames.

10. Play with her hair. Play with it HARD.

11. Warm her up when she's cold...and not by giving her your jacket...then
you might get cold. Rather, look her in the eye and say "if you don't stop
b*tching about the cold right now you're going to be b*tching about a black
eye." The best way to get warm is with fear.

12. Take her to a party. When you get there she'll have to go to the
bathroom (they always do). Leave immediately. Come back right when the
party's dying and yell at her the whole way home for ditching you at the
party.

13. Make her laugh. A good way to do this is if she has a small pet. Kick
the pet. I always find stuff like that funny. Why shouldn't girls?

14. Let her fall asleep in your arms. When she's fast asleep, wait 10
minutes then JUMP UP AND SCREAM IN HER EAR! Repeat until she goes home and
you can use your arms for more important things. Like basketball.

15. Spit often. I hear girls like guys that spit.

16. If you care about her never ever tell her. This will only give her self
confidence. Then you can never turn her into the object she deep down
desires to be.

17. Every time you're in her house steal one of the following: shoes,
earrings, or anything else that comes in pairs. Only take one of the pair.
This way she'll go crazy.

18. Take her out to dinner. Right when she's about to order interrupt and
say "No she's not hungry". Make her watch you eat. Girls love a guy that
speaks for her.

19. Look her in the eyes and smile. Then clock her one. Girls love a
spontaneous guy.

20. Give her one of your t-shirts... and make sure it has your smell on it.
But not a sexy cologne smell. A bad smell. You know what I'm talking about.

22. If you're listening to music, and she asks to hear it, tell her no.
This way she'll think you're mysterious.

23. Remember her birthday but don't get her something. Teach her material
objects aren't important. The only thing that's important is that she keeps
you happy. And your happiness is the greatest present she can ever get.

24. When she gives you a present on your birthday, Christmas, or just
whenever, take it and tell her you love it. Then next time you know she's
coming over on a trash day leave the trash can open and have the present
visibly sticking out of the can. Girls actually don't like this one that
much but I think it's funny.

25. If she's mad at you for not calling her when you say you will, promise
her that you will call her at a certain time of the day. This will make sure
that she waits by the phone. Tell her when you call you're going to tell her
a special surprise. Now she'll be really excited. Now don't call. That's
also quite funny.

I expect some people will think that's actually a joke!!

It is? Oh...  

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Thank God I've passed the boyfriend/girlfriend stage!!  Malaysia Boleh!
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______________________________
WINNER - 2008 'Tech-Head Of The Year' Award
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kam 100 and you dont wonder why you dont have a girlfriend ?  
L 405 2013 FFRR 5.0 SC
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Kam 100 - Remind myself, NEVER to bother with him!!! *ick head! You'll never see 30, believe me! not with your 'bits' in tack anyway!

Bobby wrote:

Thank God I've passed the boyfriend/girlfriend stage!!

Bobby is this information that you really want to share?  2005 Zambezi TDV6 - Gone but not forgotten
2009 Alaska TDV8 - Gone and much missed.



WINNER - 2009 �Idler Of The Year� Award
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Very Annoyed wrote:

Bobby wrote:

Thank God I've passed the boyfriend/girlfriend stage!!

Bobby is this information that you really want to share?

VA, don't know if this went over wrongly or are you in one of your moods and pulling a fast one??

Anyways, just trying to say that I went through this girlfriend phase a long time ago.... !
And we did things differently then!

KAM! - In this holiest of holy months too  Malaysia Boleh!
4.2SC Chawton White, Stormers
Tasmod's Sills, Wind Deflectors, LR Sills
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Larini Sports Exhaust, K&N Air Filter
______________________________
WINNER - 2008 'Tech-Head Of The Year' Award
WINNER - 2009 Outstanding Contribution
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Yes Kam - you naughty boy! Now beg forgiveness! 2005 Zambezi TDV6 - Gone but not forgotten
2009 Alaska TDV8 - Gone and much missed.



WINNER - 2009 �Idler Of The Year� Award
Runner Up - 2009 �Just Doing What It�s Designed To Do� Award


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We forgive you, Kam!  

2009 Outstanding Contribution Award - Joint Runner Up
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can somebody summarized all above point to break off with one girl I know I need it in one sentence
and I should work otherwise that means no body knows how to deals with their girl friends/ wifes you are all afraid of them I’m sure

caz wrote:

Kam 100 - Remind myself, NEVER to bother with him!!! *ick head! You'll never see 30, believe me! not with your 'bits' in tack anyway!

Caz is ready with her cane, Kam...  

2009 Outstanding Contribution Award - Joint Runner Up
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It made me laugh.. as its actually VERY Wrong!! especially some of the quotes..

Your dicing with a very dangerous subject there Kam.....if your going to take the *iss, take it out of blokes, plenty of subject matter there.

No wonder we have a shortage of females on this forum......or is that what you blokes prefer!!!! Know where I'm not wanted!!!!

I shall have to seriously take you in hand my boy!!

See me later for your punishment!!

 2005 Zambezi TDV6 - Gone but not forgotten
2009 Alaska TDV8 - Gone and much missed.



WINNER - 2009 �Idler Of The Year� Award
Runner Up - 2009 �Just Doing What It�s Designed To Do� Award


DO NOT CLICK HERE!